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Adams, F. Colburn (Francis Colburn)

"The Von Toodleburgs Or, The History of a Very Distinguished Family"

He's a kind of a spoon, you know. Don't know
anything of the fellow, particularly--met him outside, you know. He's
mighty sweet on the filly. She's pretty. Would'nt mind being sweet on
her myself. I'd be a little afraid the old one would want to throw
herself into the bargain. What a crusher of a mother-in-law she'd make,"
returned the young man.
"An odd-sized lot, anyhow," interrupted a third. "How frightfully the
old lady's got herself up, eh? What a melancholy little specimen of
humanity she's got for a husband, eh? Who are the Chapmans, anyhow?"
"Devilish new, devilish new," rejoined a fourth. "What a mixed lot they
have got for company."
"Fill up! fill up! gentlemen. Here's a bumper to the beautiful daughter.
Beauty and modesty carry us all captive in their charms. Let us drink to
the daughter." And they filled their glasses and drank Mattie's health.
"When my missus inwites pussons to de ball, my missus 'specs dem ar
gemmens what is inwited to presarve dar qualifications. If gemmen am
gemmen den dey don't cum'd to my missus's ball to suffocate her!" said
Bowles, expressing himself, and assuming an air of injured dignity.


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