The more I see of my own mind,
the more may the breathing of my soul be,--'If Thou wilt, Thou canst make
me clean.' Sometimes to believe that it is His will, is sweet to me, but
we must maintain the fight, for though the victory is His, the fall is
ours."
"The constant and deep consideration for others in the most minute
actions of life, how I love it, and feel myself 'as a bullock
unaccustomed to the yoke.'"
5th Month, 6th, 1822. "Days and nights of much spiritual conflict, or
rather perhaps the sight that there was much to conflict with; weak in
body and weak in mind! In my ministry more patient and deep deliberation
wanting. Last night, believed I had not kept close enough to my Guide in
prayer, with which I felt some distress,--perhaps not altogether
wrong,--but had not stopped when I ought, nor waited at every moment for
clearness and strength in the exercise; I hope I shall not hurt others."
6th Month, 1822. "A month is now passed in which I have been sweetly
enabled to enjoy the love of God in my heart. I trust we shall
experience preservation, though we may well fear for ourselves, and be
the subject of fear for others. Oh! that, without affectation, we may
live deeply in the root of life!"
4th Month, 1823.
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