Prev | Current Page 276 | Next

Twain, Mark, 1835-1910

"The 30,000 Dollar Bequest and Other Stories"


So I sent it to General Joseph R. Hawley, who was then in the House,
and he said he would present it. But he did not do it. I think
he explained that when he came to read it he was afraid of it:
it was too serious, to gushy, too sentimental--the House might take it
for earnest.
We ought to have carried out our monument scheme; we could
have managed it without any great difficulty, and Elmira would
now be the most celebrated town in the universe.
Very recently I began to build a book in which one of the minor
characters touches incidentally upon a project for a monument to Adam,
and now the TRIBUNE has come upon a trace of the forgotten jest of
thirty years ago. Apparently mental telegraphy is still in business.
It is odd; but the freaks of mental telegraphy are usually odd.



A HUMANE WORD FROM SATAN

[The following letter, signed by Satan and purporting to come from him,
we have reason to believe was not written by him, but by Mark Twain.
--Editor.]
TO THE EDITOR OF HARPER'S WEEKLY:

Dear Sir and Kinsman,--Let us have done with this frivolous talk.
The American Board accepts contributions from me every year:
then why shouldn't it from Mr. Rockefeller? In all the ages,
three-fourths of the support of the great charities has been
conscience-money, as my books will show: then what becomes of
the sting when that term is applied to Mr. Rockefeller's gift?
The American Board's trade is financed mainly from the graveyards.


Pages:
264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288