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Hughes, Rupert, 1872-1956

"We Can't Have Everything"

"
"And you ask me to join your hands in holy matrimony?"
"No, just plain legal matrimony. I was joined in holy matrimony
once, and I don't insist on that part of it again. But Charity
wants a clergyman and I don't mind."
"Really, my son, you know better than to assume this tone to me.
You've been away from church too long."
"Well, if you want to get me back, fasten me to Charity. You know
she's the best woman that ever lived."
"She is a trifle too rebellious to merit that tribute, I fear."
"Well, give her another chance. She has had enough hard knocks.
You ought to go to her rescue."
"Do you think that to be the duty of the Church?"
"It used to be, didn't it? But don't get me into theology. I can't
swim. The point is, will you marry Charity to me?"
"No!"
"Wouldn't you marry her to any man?"
"Only to one."
"Who's that?"
"Her former husband."
"But he's married to another woman."
"I do not recognize that marriage."
"Good Lord! Would you like to see Charity married to Cheever
again?"
"Yes."
"To Peter Cheever?"
"Yes."
"Whew! Say, Doctor, that's going it pretty strong."
"I do not care to discuss the sacraments with you in your present
humor."
"Did you read the trial of that woman last week who killed her
husband and was acquitted? Mrs. What's-her-name? You must have
read it."
"I pay little attention to the newspaper scandals."
"You ought to--they're what make life what it is.


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