She lacked the power to lead him from it, and
again she feared that she lacked the power because her will was not
sincere and single. Now they must go on to that uncertain end, he playing
his part before the world, before her and Aunt Maria, she looking on,
sometimes in admiration, sometimes in contempt, always in fear of the
moment when the actor's speeches would be suddenly cut short and the
curtain, falling on the interrupted scene, hide him for ever from the
audience whom he had made wondering applauding partners in his
counterfeit. The last of his life was to be like the rest of it, with the
same elements of tragedy and of farce, of what attracted and of what
revolted, of the great and the little. It was to be like in another way
too; it was to be lived alone, without any true companion for his soul,
without the love that he had not asked except of one, and, asking of that
one, had not obtained. As the days went on, the fascination of the
spectacle she watched grew on her; it was more poignant now than in the
former time, and it filled all her life.
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