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Quiller-Couch, Arthur Thomas, Sir, 1863-1944

"News from the Duchy"

Do you plead Guilty or Not Guilty?"
"Guilty, y'r Worships."
The constable, on a nod from the Inspector, cleared his throat, and
stated the charge: "On the 6th instant, y'r Worships, at 10.45 in the
evening, being on duty in the neighbourhood of Lobb's Barn," etc.
Defendant, on being arrested, had used the filthiest language, and
had for some time stoutly resisted being marched off to the lock-up.
"That will do," the Chairman interrupted. "You, Edwards--if that's
your real name--"
"It'll do for this job," put in the prisoner.
"Very well. Have you anything to say?"
The prisoner ran his eye along the array of Justices.
"Seems a lot o' dogs for one bone!"
The Admiral stiffened with wrath, and the crimson of his face
deepened as Lord Rattley threw himself back in his chair, laughing.
"Forty shillings, or a month!"
"Oh, come--I say!" Lord Rattley murmured.
The Admiral, glancing to right and left, saw, too, that three or four
of his colleagues were lifting their eyebrows in polite protest.
"I--I beg your pardon, gentlemen, for not consulting you! Correct
me, if you will. I would point out, however, that in addition to the
offence with which he is charged, this fellow was guilty of violent
and disgusting language, and, further, of resisting the police.


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